Wings of the Dawn

It’s been (and still is) a long, cold winter here in Wisconsin. The grass disappeared what seems like a decade ago and has been covered since with ice, snow, more ice and more snow. I love going on walks but the weather has dampened my enthusiasm quite a bit. This morning however, I went out with the dog and the steadfast mind of a mailman. Yes, “Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds.” I thought to my self.

I had walked confidently for about five minutes when I turned the corner. Suddenly, a blast of icy snow pelted me in the face. I pulled my hat tighter over my ears and wrapped the scarf around my mouth. The whistling freeze tried to crawl into every open crevice of the layers of my clothes. My determination to walk three miles was quickly replaced by visions of me with a cup of hot tea on my couch.

At the very moment of wanting to abandon my “rounds”, my phone vibrated in my pocket. I read the text on my screen,

“I don’t negotiate!”

The text came from my friend. I smiled, knowing what she was saying. Her husband recently had a bad accident. While extremely blessed, he still has to deal with four broken ribs and a bruised lung. She explained to me that even though it is hard, and her husband is tired of the breathing exercises, she is staying strong, not negotiating and encouraging him to do them.

As I looked down the road, facing this harsh wind, I was reminded how quickly I negotiate with myself. I make up excuses why a thing that is hard is not worth the fight. I want to give into my weak body, not allowing for something to produce a greater outcome later.

“I don’t negotiate!” 

Was this walk really that difficult, or was my imagination of comfort motivating me? I knew if I kept walking, for another mile and a half, I could turn around and have the wind in my back. It would feel only like a breeze then. … and it did.

“For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit,
and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh,
for these are opposed to each other,
to keep you from doing the things you want to do.”
Galatians 5:17

“Lord, show me when I negotiate with myself and give into the weakness of my flesh. Keep me focused on the goal and the good that comes from persevering in my trials. Sustain me with your encouragement from your Word. Lead me with your Spirit and expose the lies I believe about myself, others, my circumstances, and more importantly about you.” 

(Pictures and Devotional by Heidi Viars, 2019)

Communion

She wrapped her right thumb and pointer finger around the tiny, clear communion cup and cradled her left hand around it all. She stared into the dark grape juice.
The music played softly in the background while the ushers served communion to the congregation.
She could see the light of the sanctuary reflecting in the liquid circle in her hand. Her breaths were shallow while she tried to quiet her heart and soul. She thought of the disciples and wondered what they must have thought when Jesus handed them a cup of wine to pass and when He spoke of things they couldn’t quite comprehend yet.

While she looked down into the cup, she noticed consistent vibrations in the juice. Had she moved and caused the liquid to be stirred? Could the music have caused resonance?

She placed the cup on her Bible on the seat next to her. Nothing. The liquid didn’t move. She picked it back up. With the cup securely in her hand, her thumb pressing around it and her other hand steadily holding on to hand and cup, the liquid rhythmically pulsated once more.

In an instant it became clear to her. It was her own pulse from her thumb pushing through the cup into the dark, red liquid. No doubt, she saw her own heartbeat pulsating in the communion cup.

Before she lifted the cup to drink it, she silently thanked God for making a way for her to see it. She thanked Him for allowing her a small glimpse into this mystery that allowed her own heart to hide in His, to see herself as a part of this covenant that God made with His people. In that moment, when she saw part of herself in the cup, she knew again how much she was loved.

“God, I am forever grateful to You that my heart can beat for You.
You made a way for me through the blood of Your Son, Jesus Christ. 
Thank You!”

…And likewise the cup after they had eaten, saying,
“This cup that is poured out for you is the new covenant in my blood.
Luke 22:20

That I’m in you and you in me
This is a profound mystery.
You died my death – your blood you shed.
I made alive while you were dead.

How can a mind like mine conceive
Why thrones and kingdoms you would leave
To make a wayward heart like mine
A temple and a holy shrine?
~
(Poetry and Essay by Heidi Viars, 2019)

I believe that great changes in life come as a result of small adjustments in our thinking. As Christians we must allow our tender and compassionate God to bend our view toward His treasures and our good. When we allow Him to work in this way, slightly moving us and bending us toward Himself, we not only change our perspective but we change ourselves. Those changes in us can become powerful change agents in the world.

I took these photos after dropping the kids off at school. The difference between the top and the bottom picture is only ONE INCH in my position.

“Lord, I am stubborn and many times unmovable. I often proclaim judgements over circumstances before you had a chance working them out. Please help me to bend toward the Light of your Son and living in the assurance that you are always good. Show me Jesus and give me the strength to move into your direction of loving kindness.” 

In every thing give thanks:
for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.
1 Thessalonians 5:18